Sunday Morning Musings

[fencerm2]

My mom has been in town, visiting from MN since Wednesday.  I love my mom, don't get me wrong...but there are multiple reasons why I live 1200 or so miles away...

I don't know who is making me crazier...her or my sister.  As per usual (and this began when my sis get her MA) I can never do good enough by either or them.  (My sis loves to look down on me from her degree and job pedastal - and she's the younger by 5 years.)  I am unwilling, and to some degree, unable, to completely drop my life simply because mom comes to visit.  I make a tremendous amount of time for her, of course (which is why I had to miss Mistletoe Revel yesterday) but no matter - I don't give her my complete, total, and undivided time.
Spent yesterday morning at HomeDespot with pascual_del_mar getting materials to put my new kitchen together.  But because it took longer than expected, we (mom, sis and sis' bf) couldn't go out for lunch together.  Nevermind we had plans to spend the evening in NYC catching an off B'way show and then a trek over to Long Island City for dinner and a jaunt to Rockefeller Center to see the tree after that - I didn't make myself totally available. 
Today is the staff holiday party at The Urban Muse.  My sister has tickets to a concert tonight, so I get to take mom along with me.  Family is welcome to the party, though the first 30 minutes are for the staff to exchange Secret Santa gifts and all.  And of course, mom doesn't fully understand why I am choosing to work at the store, rather than my previous job.  Of course, when you get right down to it - my mom doesn't really understand me.
I take my mom to Newark Airport tomorrow morning, so my life is all my own again.  Am I selfish because I don't want to drop absolutely everything I do because she comes to visit? 

Ok, venting complete.  Thank you.

Comments

[alphasarah.livejournal.com]

You are not selfish. You're doing what you can to include her in your activities (taking her to the holiday party), but she's selfish to think that your life should revolve around HER. You're making an effort, and so should she. Especially if your sis is nearby, so there are two outlets for the motherly love. :^D

[forsair.livejournal.com]

Nope. You are an adult and have things that need doing. My mom, when she deigns to visit understands that. Of course my mother hasn't spent more than 36 hours in my presence in over 2 years. A visit longer than three days will come to strong words.

Parent's don't get their offspring and frequently try to impose their hopes and dreams for us onto us, when we are our own people and have hopes and aspirations and dreams for ourselves.

Good luck!

[katyaehal.livejournal.com]

It's rare for ppl to grow up and thier parents to grow up into thier best friends and not just parents of adults. Normally, if it happens it's because something terrible has happened between the child and the parents and then peace was finally reached. So in some ways you are lucky. While I love that my parents are friends and not truly parents anymore, I would not wish my teen age years on anyone. Maybe you should ask your Mom to stop trying to "mother" you and try to become your friend instead. It does make a difference, friends are ppl we accept no matter what because we love them for themshelves and not our expectations of them.
Huggles dear just try to remember that her behavior probably stems from wanting the best for you and from missing so much of your life because of living so far away-thus her desire to spend every moment with you when she visits.

[rlg.livejournal.com]

That, I fear is the nature of mothers. They expect the world to continue to revolve around them.